Overseas readers, punctuation and beer.

I often wonder what my overseas readers think of this blog; I know I have one or two who regularly look in. Perhaps they are expats who want a reminder of dear old blighty.

I get very few comments posted so have little feedback, which is a shame; I have even tried bad punctuation in the hope that I will draw out the colon fanatics, sadly to no avail.

I do hope however that if they ever visit London they will let me know in advance... I can then buy them a beer in the Cow.

Michael Campari

Michael Campari crooned the night away at Port Eliot... Great fun.

http://michaelcampari.com/

Port Eliot Images

Charlie Dancey


Murray Lachlan Young
Bess Cavendish
Michael Campari


Marlon

Port Eliot Festival.

I will not bore you with details of the journey down through sometimes torrential rain. Nor will I bore you with tales of camping; not an activity I relish.

Port Eliot was fantastic, the setting is perfect and the slightly decaying house appears more of a rocky outcrop than a man made structure. I was welcomed, and looked after, by some lovely people most notably Shelly, Rick and Marlon; thank you for that!

The Times described the festival as 'Notting Hill on sea' and there certainly did appear to be a large number of my neighbours down there... The Blue bar tent became the Port Eliot 'Cow' for the duration.

There were some great acts; I'll discuss those in a later blog, and some real surprises; most notably Lana Citron's 'lecture' on kissing... Not to be missed.

Something of a cloud hovered over our weekend due to a broken down car but our bacon was well and truly saved by Charlie Dancey and 'Tugger'. Charlie you are a star!

The atmosphere throughout the weekend was extremely happy... The whole thing was a joy.

I'll write about my 'gig' at a later date!

Copping out.

I hate to have to say this but tonight I had intended to write at length but I am so tired I'm copping out. Tomorrow is another day.

Grayson Perry Arrives at Port Eliot.

I'd been sitting outside the bar tent when a strange apparition rumbled into view, a small crowd gathered, including a BBC camera. I wandered over to take a look:



I met Grayson briefly later at the performers party where he was more formally dressed and again the following day sitting out on the grass in a summer frock and red shoes. He didn't come to hear my poems though. Never mind.  

Road trip and Port Eliot festival

I could do with a break, things have been hectic just lately. I'm leaving the laptop behind for a few days; I'll take a notebook of course.

I'm performing in the Walled Garden at Port Eliot at 7.30 pm on Friday... Look forward to seeing you there! I'll report back on Sunday

.http://www.porteliotfestival.com/

Simon and Garfunkel - Bridge Over Troubled Water Original Version

Peace, love and, oh yeah: Rape! Lattitude Festival.

I heard about this in the pub tonight... two young girls raped at Lattitude last weekend.

Maybe the nice middle class people there were too drugged up to hear the cries. Maybe. Maybe it didn't matter because it wasn't one of them. Maybe. Maybe the girls dressed inappropriately; ie no designer labels. Maybe.

If Hendrix were alive today he'd shoot himself with Curt's gun!

Scuse me while I kiss the sky!

Overheard in a Notting Hill pub: One lady who lunches on cocaine to another - 'Yes but they were only local girls, and you know what they are like'. I did not make this up!

Agony Aunt.

I was thinking about dysfunctional families.

You know, planet Earth, dysfunctional family or what?

I wanted to write to some-one about it and looked for an agony aunt.

Agony Aunt... Excuse me but that is an oxymoron surely... Thus:

Dear Auntie

I'm in agony

I've fallen in love

with the mum of my cousin

yeah the twin of my mother

and then to cap that

so has my brother

he's fallen in love

before you get thinking

that that can't be too bad

I've just discovered

that so has my dad

he's fallen in love

Dear auntie

it's agony falling in love.

they're now always fighting

my pop and my mother

when they're doing that

I'm fighting my brother

We say we are all doing it

for the sake of our aunt

our maxim our mantra

our scientologists chant

Dear auntie

I'm in agony

And i'm no longer in love.

Pop up Cinema in Portobello Road.

I'd heard about it then sort of forgot about it with all the other stuff going on; a pop up digital microplex cinema has been set up under the westway opposite Portobello Green.

There are some interesting films lined up, sadly I will miss 'Performance' on Saturday the 24th but hope to get down there for 'Withnail and I' on the 30th.

Check it out online at: http://www.portobellopopup.com/

An open letter to Mr Kee Scott.

Fraser, I am in no way criticising your religious views or indeed your right to chose your particular brand of 'religion'. I have every right to criticise scientology though and I don't think I'm alone in wanting to do so. The concerns I have are as follows:

1. When it emerged that You had accepted money From Warren Todd and the Tabernacle event was cancelled/postponed the blame was laid on the Tabernacle. You said at the time that you would hand the money back, disassociate Mr Todd from the Portobello Rocks event and issue a statement to that effect. To date no such statement has been issued and no-one is any the wiser. I only attempted to explain to the community the full reasons for the cancellation.

2. I do not understand how you feel you have the right to appoint yourself to the role of arbitrator or mediator and then set up a forum without serious consultation with the community... As you were told at the Tabernacle meeting you could only be perceived as a 'lobbyist' for Mr Todd (having accepted his money) and therefore definitely not Neutral. It is with respect to the 'forum' that I harbour my concerns ( concerns that were already being aired by other members of the community) about the Scientology link.

3. I received unpleasant 'phone calls from supporters of the Church of Scientology which is the bullying I referred to... I was certainly not bullied by any of your associates.

I have always supported the Portobello Rocks concert and continue to do so. I wish you all well in that endeavour. However I cannot support the hijacking of the Portobello Road cause in the manner proposed by yourself. Please issue a statement regarding your position with Mr Todd as it certainly does impact on the proposed 'forum'.

It would also help, in future, if you could spell my name right.

Regards

Scientology, Portobello and um yes scientology.

When I blogged about Potobello Rocks being cancelled I mentioned scientology.

I got a lot of shit back for mentioning religion... I was pressurised into taking the scientology reference out of the blog. And you know, I bowed to the pressure. I was bullied!

That is what scientologists do; they bully!

The fact is that there was a rather dodgy element to the Portobello Rocks agenda... From my point of view the whole thing was being hijacked by dodgy geezers.

Look at this before we go any further:http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/arts/article-23397709-scientology-sect-using-british-art-as-a-front.do

Fraser Kee Scott is the man who had decided to be the self appointed spokesperson for Portobello Road, backed by, and here is the funny bit, NOT WarrenTodd, but by Scientology!

Scientology is not about religion, scientology is about bullying... Crass bullying at that.

If god existed I can assure you he would not be a scientologist. And if god existed he would not want scientologists holding a forum on the future of Portobello Road.

If god existed he would be buying a couple of silver spoons on the Portobello and then going for a beer in the Gold, meeting us and then talking about how we are going to sort this shit out!

Warren Todd would be sitting at his feet.