Ringo in Notting Hill

Starch, Psychopaths and Panto.

And we're back...

After two weeks of bedrest and the well starched attention of  nurse Hope I am finally up and about again.

Just in time too.  It is the last night of the Portobello Panto at the Tabernacle... Certainly not to be missed; more later. There are still tickets available for this afternoons show at: http://www.tabernaclelive.co.uk/whats-on/

The psychopath is off my back; focusing elsewhere no doubt.

Winter solstice.

Captain Beefheart is dead...

His stuff was hard work and sometimes impossible but he was an original...

Ryan O'Reilly, the Cow, Claudia Schiffer and whelks.

After a day dealing with the psychotic bitch in my life the Cow called...

Guinness, molluscs, bivalves, winkles, oysters, prawns and whelks with Ryan O'Riley of the Ryan O'Riley band and the man in a pink hoodie who looked as if he had lived enough this week without the burden of the upcoming days.

Ryan told the story of how a copper had tried to move him on in Portobello Road for waking Claudia Schiffer up.... It's ok Claudia, Ryan and the band are going on a European tour soon.

The winkles tasted of Eastbourne according to the man in the pink hoodie.

One of us cannot be wrong.

I had not heard this before... I have now.

Blake Edwards has died... RIP.

Harrods Christmas sentiment... In lights.

From DASHPERIOD

‘Fuck off Harrods’ done by a disgruntled employee, fired by Harrods from his job as the toy department’s Father Christmas, took revenge last night in spectacular style.

Gaining access to a maintenance control room, Lloyd Hudson, 35, from Ilford, Essex, was able to locate the chart and corresponding switches for Harrods’ 10,000 external lights.

Barracading himself in, Hudson disabled the correct lights until he could spell out his feelings to Harrods bosses and Christmas shoppers alike. He was removed by security guards after an hour-long stand-off, then handed over to police.

“He had drunk the best part of two bottles of whisky,” said a spokesperson for the iconic London store, “and it’s that kind of behaviour that got him the sack in the first place.” Hudson has since been released on police bail.

Knightsbridge visitors were stunned.

“Honestly, I am disgusted, ” said Irene Rider, 59, from Gary, Indiana. “I was with my grandchildren. We had just gotten off the bus. I said ‘look everybody’ and pointed up to the lights – but you know what the lights said? They said f**k off. And that is not an appropriate message for a child.  At least not at Christmas time.”

I love that 'at least not at Christmas' bit...   And of course Santa got the sack; Santa got the toys in the sack... even doctor Zeuss knows that. That Santa got the sack…..

None of the above is true of course. It is photoshoppery from The Poke.

Rachman at his height...

Click HERE for more from Ladbroke Grove 50's - 70's

Cutting Coke with Gold dust in Notting Hill.

A night out with the new Muse; Honesty. where do they get their names from these mid-western girls?

I asked her that. She replied: 'My dad got it from a seed catalogue'.

Anyway, once we's got off the subject of horticulture and how big her dad was and what kind of shot he used in his 12 bore and the fact that her leopard skin leggings were itching up a storm I excused myself for a pee.

Can't tell you where we were but I can tell you that the loo's were liberally sprinkled with gold dust... Shit! I thought. They are cutting the Coke with gold these days...  I took a sniff from a non urinal area; I wasn't that drunk.

Jeez.... Tinsel.

They are cutting the Coke with tinsel for Christmas.

They are not however cutting the bullshit.

New Years Eve, Rotten Hill Gang, Tabernacle... Sorted.

This post has been removed for legal reasons.  sorry.

Inadequates and drug problems.

Why do inadequates always cite drug problems as an excuse for being inadequate?

They were inadequate before they took drugs; the drugs just compound the inadequacy.

'Poor me'. They say. 'I am a victim of society'.

Bollocks.... They prey on society, demanding attention and compassion. They give nothing back.

If you cannot handle your drugs don't do them. Simple as that.