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Tuesday, 29 September 2015

My dad haunts my selfies.

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Every time I take a selfie my dad photo bombs it.
Friday, 25 September 2015

Kenny Zulu Whitmore and a London Taxi.

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Walking to the pub last night I found this London taxi on Portobello Road. This kind of thing is what makes this ...
Sunday, 20 September 2015

Tertius Peat. The last true Englishman.

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Tertius Peat is on his deathbed in a secure hospital in Wiltshire. Tertius Peat is the last true Englishman, by that I mean that he is the s...
Monday, 14 September 2015

Prime Minister surgically removed from Man's arse.

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The prime minister was surgically removed from David Cameron's arse earlier today in an operation later described as ...
Sunday, 13 September 2015

Advice to Vegans on arriving in Hell. Meat your maker.

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Believe it or not quite a lot of vegans go to hell. Percentage wise there is no difference between vegans, vegetarians and omnivores (all ca...
Wednesday, 9 September 2015

Dole scroungers have it hard enough without Immigrants.

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A guest blog by Jan Nieupjur. As a dole scrounger of 50 years I find it sickening that my way of life is being threatened by these immigr...
Friday, 4 September 2015

Nitrous Oxide and how it works.

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As a layman I am frequently asked: "How does laughing gas work?" It is simple really. You decant the cylinder into a balloon the...
Monday, 31 August 2015

Notting Hill Carnival 2015.

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Apres Ska. The real stars of Carnival, after the bands and dancers, are of course the street cleaners who work t...
Sunday, 30 August 2015

Notting Hill Carnival 2015.

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There is always one idiot. As the hoarding go up in Notting Hill the graffiti guys arrive like a swarm of wasps at a j...
Sunday, 23 August 2015

Compulsory smoking for the obese and other government wheezes.

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A guest blog from Jan Nieupjur. As usual Jan's views do not necessarily reflect my own. He is completely senile now but that do say th...
Friday, 21 August 2015

Immigrants. An analogy.

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Talking with the kids the other day we got onto the subject of immigrants and their positive effects. I found a perfect analogy in the garde...

Banksy speaks about his drab 'Dismaland'.

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Banksy, the Entrepreneur, chancer and snake oil salesman formerly known as a vandal has finally decided to crawl up his o...
Sunday, 31 May 2015

Lard.

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I am a worshipper of noble lard alabaster queen of fat the renderings of the regal pig in a half pound grease proofed pat lard has n...