From our Olympic correspondent Jared Kushner.
That old bolshie Corbyn has been at it again: my man at the Sun reliably informs me that the entire OAR team at the winter Olympics are as high as a kite 24/7 thanks to Jeremy 'Ice Man' Corbyn and his Orient Express drug supply operation. It has also been confirmed that Corbyn has been manufacturing Meldonium in his allotment shed from surplus rhubarb and flogging it to the ruskies by the barrowload..
Meldonium was originally developed as an embarrasment substitute, designed to make toes curl. It was recently discovered that it also caused a similar reaction in the Ailsa Craig granite that curling stones are made from.
Here is a photograph of corbyn wearing a red tie... Proof that he is a drug dealing commie.